Who am I aiming to please?

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Galatians 1:10 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Paul is writing a letter to the Galatian church. It seems that the Galatians had accepted Christ, but now there was a different gospel being preached and it was becoming widely accepted. Paul doesn't go into the details of the differences between the true gospel and the counterfeit one, but he does clearly say that whoever is distorting the gospel should be accursed. Then Paul says that he is no longer seeking man's approval, but only the approval of God. So, the distorted gospel that is being preached is a people pleasing gospel. However, Paul notes that if he were still trying to please man, then he wouldn't be a servant of Christ.

Last night, I devo-ed on a very similar topic. I had written down Mark 15:15 which says that Pilate wanted to satisfy the crowd, so he released Barabbas to them and had Jesus crucified. I wonder why God is speaking to me on this subject again? Did I not learn my lesson already? Is there something I am missing in terms of conviction? I know that just recently, I had decided to work until January. I truly felt it was what God was asking of me. He wants me to push through the hard times so that the harvest can be twice as sweet. If everything was easy, wouldn't I be tempted to sin? If I have made a people pleasing decision instead of a Christ-like decision, then I repent! I do not want to go that way! But I heard the Lord so clearly. I understood, when He spoke to me that I need to not choose the easy way out. Recently, I've been feeling very unloved. I've been feeling lonely. It's really weird. I feel like I'm failing as a wife. Like my husband is not satisfied with my effort. I feel like the people I interact with at work are just using me for their gain. I feel so drained and miserable. But at the same time, I feel God close by and He is my strength and comfort. God is my joy. I know that people don't mean to treat me that way, but I do feel taken advantage of. I feel like also, people don't think I'm trying my best. But maybe a lot of those thoughts and feelings are just my own self-esteem beating down on me. If I dwell on those thoughts, I will not be holding my mind captive to the things of God. I really need to make sure that I am doing things for the Lord and not for man. I want to be a servant of God.

Heavenly Father, please forgive me for seeking man's approval. Please change me from glory to glory more into Your image. Lord, I run to You with my arms wide open. I want to serve You alone, Lord. Jesus, I want to follow You. I crucify my flesh today and ask that You would show me every area that I need to change and improve in. Please fill me with Your Holy Spirit. Saturate me with Your love, Oh God. Please help me to be a better wife. Help me to be a better servant of God. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray, Amen.